A few days before the Utah County Republican Convention, the Republican delegates in Legislative District 57 received a letter from the Foundation for Government Accountability (“FGA”) giving us their honest assessment of the candidates.
You know the letter. It lionized Rep. Brian Greene (who eventually won with 69.8% of the vote) and blasted John G. Stevens (for unconfirmable employment) and Holly Richardson (for “tweeting” and for “blogging”).
But this letter, though claiming to be from the FGA and sent on FGA letterhead, was done without the knowledge or consent of the Foundation for Government Accountability, which is why they filed a complaint with the Utah Elections Office.
That brings us to Saturday, when a NEW letter arrived in delegates’ mailboxes after they had cast their votes. This one on no official letterhead, but filled with anonymous sincerity. The author didn’t sign his (or her) name, so I’ll just have to call them: Utah’s Profile in Courage.
Utah’s Profile in Courage starts by expressing their deepest and most sincere apology. Why now? What changed? Maybe they knew Fast Sunday was the next day, and didn’t want their voice to crack during the emotional bearing of their testimony. Perhaps their conscience was pricked by the gentle request of the FGA for Lt. Governor Spencer Cox to get to the bottom of this. Maybe they realized this was an actual crime. Or, perhaps they concluded the results were in, the deed was done, why keep feeling guilty?
The letter goes on to confess the deception of leading delegates to believe the letter was from a foundation. Just because they used the foundation’s name, logo, leaderhead, and copied/pasted lines from their official website, they could see where people might have gotten the wrong idea. “I hurt the Foundations reputation by my careless act.” I’m sure on behalf of foundations everywhere, forgiveness is forthcoming.
The next phrase is the most priceless, because it’s the one where Utah’s Profile in Courage really means it. “The facts in the letter are truthful.” So the first fact introduced in the letter stated that it was from the FGA. I’m so confused. Next, the letter says “they” conducted interviews with colleagues and acquaintances, even though not one person has come forth to say anyone from the FGA contacted them. (Oh, that’s right. Because they didn’t.) So which facts were truthful? The ones where anonymous people think Brian Greene is amazing, John Stevens is a credit-hog, and Holly Richardson is “surprisingly moderate”?
Next, Utah’s Profile in Courage asks our forgiveness. After all, Utah’s Profile in Courage promises they’ve never made up crap under an anonymous name before and never will again. So really Utah’s Profile in Courage is a victim here. After all, they “got swept up in the ugliness of politics.” See, when you get swept up, it’s okay. We’ve all written anonymous letters stealing someone else’s logo to lend credibility to our views, haven’t we? Let he who is without sin commit the first fraud.
Utah’s Profile in Courage has made anonymous contact with the real FGA, the real lieutenant governor’s office, and the real three candidates, and anonymously apologized. They would like all of us to “except” this apology, and in a nice concluding gesture, thanks us for dedicating our time and energy to the caucus system where lying liars anonymously distribute fraudulent letters.
I’ve been asked to “except” this apology, and that is exactly what I plan to do. I plan to take exception to an apology that says, “sorry, not sorry.” I will “accept” the apology once Utah’s Profile in Courage gives their real name. In the meantime, go get ‘em, Spencer.